Here is a question asked by Regan and an interesting one indeed.
Well, the bad news is: there is no straight answer. The good news is: we can all find the answer by ourselves. But it is a long and difficult process. I'll try to explain as much as I can the way I am trying to find my middle ground and the zone of peacefullness that goes with it.
I think that the most interesting moments in one's life is when this person puts himself/herself in danger, out of the zone of comfort. It can be physical or spiritual. For instance, I found myself in danger when I was riding crazy horses in the australian bush while working in a cattle station: I've never felt so alive and living in the moment. I felt in danger when I tried (as everyone else did successfully) to jump of a 14 metres height cliff. I couldn't do it, it was above my spiritual strenght. I found myself in great discomfort when I started Kendo, especially on week ends and there again I got beaten: I stopped going on week ends until very recently; and now that I wear bogu on week ends, the challenge is very high!
The common point to all this moments is that we are true to ourselves, no cheating, no lies, we know what we feel because fear or alertness are very pure feelings. Therefore, if we can see ourselves as we are (we like it or not), we have more chances to take the right decision. This decision can be to become a better person or to keep going the same way or to change our lives, etc...
When we put ourselves where we cannot lie to ourselves, we can have a pick on our middle ground, our state of grace, we suddenly know what we want as well as what we don't want. It doesn't mean that we access it but it means that we can figure out what it is and then work towards it. Then again, it is not easy... It is NOT easy...
"Do you know that the hardest thing to do and the right thing to do are usually the same thing? Nothing that has meaning is easy. Easy doesn't enter into grown up life."'The weather man' - Steven ConradThe only answer I found for myself, well, the best one anyway, is Kendo.
I feel challenged all the time because I am not use to confront anyone. Being in a fight is very new for me and training to fight is even more of a challenge. I come from a very peaceful place and deciding to learn a martial art and apply its teaching in my everyday life is something that will give me some personnal work for many years to come.
Do I find peace? Well, no actually and I am far from it but I really want to find it, I want to know what it is to feel good with myself. Physical practice and spiritual awarness will hopefully help me on the way.
Do you want to know how far I want to push it? hahaha! here is a hint: I am planning to ride a bicycle around Japan for a year and visit as many Dojos as I can to be able to get a little closer to my middle ground. But shhhhhh... it is still in preparation. The question I ask myself the most is: will I have the guts to do it when the time comes?
"And yet the hardest thing is to always stay true to yourself... even when you are unsure of who you are."Paolo coelho